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You know you are getting old if….?

-Your household plants are alive and you can’t smoke them.
-Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question
-You keep more food in your fridge than beer
-6:00am is when you get up, not when you go to bed
-Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the begining of one
-You watch the weather channel
-You friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up” and “break up”
-You’ve said the words “I just can’t drink like I use too”
-A 4.00 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good s**t”
-You’re the one calling the police because those %$&# kids next door won’t turn down the radio
-Older relatives feel comftorable telling sex jokes infront of you
-You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore
-Your friend is pregnant you say “Congrats” instead of “Holy S*** what the hell happend?!”
-You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s leftovers
-Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt
-You go to a drug store to buy antacid and Ibuprofen not condoms and pregnancy tests

Isn’t that the truth!!!

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